All it took was 5 minutes

On Sunday night, it only took a mere 5 minutes for the nation and the world to see an aspect of America many do not want to talk about… or stand up against. First off, let me say that I too was disgusted with what took place on Sunday night. I truly believe that Miley was used to get the nation talking. Everyone has seen her push the limitations more and more, so of course it would make sense for a network, such as MTV, to push Miley off the edge. However, I think that even beyond Miley and MTV, there are a lot of other responsible parties in that matter. I believe these responsible parties point towards some serious flaws in our society, and therefore need to be talked about.

1. It would make sense to label Miley as the first to blame because she is in charge of her actions. She has been the one to seek to push so far away from her Hannah Montana life to where she is barely recognizable. Ultimately, all of her stunts have shown one common theme: she will do anything and all it takes to receive validation from others. She wants to be the topic of conversation. Through all of her antics, I believe we see one of the purest forms of true self-esteem issues. Therefore, it is important for her stunt to be talked about to girls struggling with identity issues.

At some point in every girl’s life there comes a time in which a girl begins to doubt herself. She sees the “prettier girls” getting attention, and therefore seeks to find ways for herself to attain such attention. Often times this attention comes from improving one’s sex appeal. It has become the norm in America to pursue attention through exploiting one’s assets, and yet women all across the country are enraged at such exploitation. Where is the consistency? Why must Hollywood determine what a woman is worth? Why must intelligence and poise be replaced by fake boobs and makeup? And why, as a country, are we obsessed with women like Miley, Kim, and Lindsay, instead of seeking to emulate Princess Kate? It is imperative for young ladies to understand, that no amount of attention, makeup, or clothing can define a woman’s worth. It is imperative for young men to understand that the girls they see as objects typically only see the boys as objects as well. Instead of praising a woman’s sex appeal, we need to raise up a generation that praises a woman for her humble elegance. We need more women who can talk about real issues instead of living in a fantasy “real housewife world”. We need more women who are willing to stand up for injustices before they seek to be another pretty face. Most of all, we need more women who will stop at nothing to bring change, in order that God may receive the glory.

2. The second responsible party is Robin Thicke and his wife. If marriage were a true sacred covenant to these people, perhaps Sunday night (or the outrageous music video) would not occur. It has been reported that Robin Thicke’s wife had no issue with what happened Sunday. She has seen it enough times for it not to bother her. I can undoubtedly tell you that if I saw another woman all over my husband in such a manner, that out of my commitment to our marriage and the covenant I made with the Lord, I would NEVER have excused such behavior! However, the Thicke’s are like many American couples, their own desires mean more to them individually than their marriage. Such is the case with many others. Whether it be someone else at the office, different dreams, the desire for more money, divorce is an everyday occurrence in our culture. Society does not place value on the vows that were spoken. Society places value on the individual and their dreams. Marriage is not about making each other happy all the time, it isn’t about fulfilling each other’s sexual needs, and it even has nothing to do with the American Dream. All of those aspects are by-products of a marriage that is a sacred union under the lordship of Jesus Christ. Marriage is a holy and sacred union that is to be protected. Had Robin Thicke truly loved and respected his wife, Miley would not have been able to come within five feet of him.

3. The third responsible party is Miley’s parents. Instead of admonishing their daughter, the Cyrus’ excused her actions. Instead of making her face the consequences of her actions, they have sought to be her support and her friend. I have seen this on a small-scale within my own community time and time again, and I will say the firmly: Parents, it is NOT your job to be your child’s best friend and biggest support group! It is your job to raise your child with standards, to reprimand them when they do wrong, and praise them for their right choices. It is your job to provide a shelter in which their minds are able to absorb the things that matter, rather than absorb the lies of this world. It is your job to encourage them to make their dreams come true, not to push them into the spotlight for your own gain. It is your job to be the person they desire to be. If you are their friend, how can you be their role model? How can you instill discipline when all you are to them is the “cool parent that buys them stuff’? Trust me, as a strong-willed child myself, there have been many a day when I hated the discipline in which I was raised. I fought against expectations of my parents for many years, only to come back and seek to be just like my mom. It is my parents’ influence in my life that has pushed me to value the morals that were instilled in me, to fight for a holy union with my husband, and to stand up for the Lord and His Word. It was my parents who created such an environment for me, not my friends.

4. The next responsible party is Hollywood and the media. Just as I mentioned above, the goal of this stunt was to get the nation talking. It was become a cover story for news outlets and just another aspect of Hollywood. The more it is talked about on the national level, the more clips that are shown, the more attention the stunt gets. Eventually the media will continue to cover the story to the point where no one cares anymore… This stunt will too become a distant memory, just like the lip-lock that occurred between Madonna, Britney, and Christina a few years ago. It is likely the VMAs will have better ratings next year, because everyone will want to see what crazy stunt will be pulled again. Next year, some other artist will be used as a tool to get the nation talking once again. People that are seeking fame and fortune are a dime a dozen, so eventually someone will step up to the plate and deliver another shocking performance. The quality of the actors or music in Hollywood essentially means nothing when the stories of celebrities cause more of a buzz than their “talent”.

5. The last responsible party is us. We are the ones who encourage for such things to occur on TV. We support the shows that directly contradict God’s Word, all because they are dramatic or funny. We are the ones who buy the song because it’s catchy, without any concern for the words. We are the ones who use our influence of money to push Hollywood to continue to produce such trash. We have in essence laid down the foundation for such things to happen because we have chosen to be silent out of fear, instead of courageous against all odds. I pray that instead of casting this issue off to the wayside in a few weeks, that we will take the time to evaluate it and seek change. I earnestly pray for the salvation of all those involved in this issue. I pray that people will see the errors of their ways and come to Jesus. Most of all, I pray that I will shield my home from the things of this world, that I will grow in my knowledge of my Savior over the headlines, and that I will be used to bring honor and glory to the Lord above all else.

I’m Feeling 22…Life in Transition

The popular Taylor Swift song glorifies being twenty-two. It’s catchy, popular, and just so happens to be the opposite of how I have felt about being twenty-two. Granted I am unlike many twenty-two year olds in that I am married, own a home in the suburbs, and have an intense bout of baby fever. But along with all that grown up talk, I have yet to finish my degree (August 2014 better hurry up y’all!), I am struggling to get a photography business consistently growing, I am the ONLY one of my closest friends who is married, and out of the close friends I have around me now I am the only one without kids or some on the way. I am literally in a twenty-two year olds no man’s land. One minute I am worrying about finances and trying to sneak through the baby section at Target, the next I’m at a Justin Bieber concert (which was awesome by the way, don’t hate!). Life is at just an awkward transition. I’m learning that college ruins a girls wardrobe, and that marriage ruins any hope of returning to the jeans I wore in High School. Yoga pants, sorority t-shirts, and Nike shorts, don’t cut it in the real world. I am learning that school after marriage is frustrating and monotonous, and while it is necessary to finish, the motivation to finish is extremely lacking. I am learning that baby fever comes fast and envelopes your whole mind and CANNOT, I repeat, CANNOT be removed once it has festered in the mind. I am learning that owning a home, while it is a wonderful thing, is also a money drain because things are constantly needing to be done. And throughout all of this, I have noticed that I have been real quick to feel sorry for myself (or take it out on my husband) rather than going to the Father. I have sought to live stress free, without seeking His wisdom and understanding. I have prayed for different situations before asking for the Lord’s will to be done. And I have looked back, instead of pressing on towards what is ahead. Being twenty-two has been hard for me, but it should never have been used as an excuse to push the Lord out of my life. Will I look back on this year of my life and love every aspect about it? Heck no! However, I will be able to look back and see just how much God allowed for me to grow, in spite of my selfish attitude. Aside from all the funny/ridiculous lessons I have learned, I am in the process of learning to develop an attitude of gratefulness and constant seeking of the Lord’s will. Right now I am meant to be in this stage of life. He is in complete control! Despite my lazy wardrobe, project weekends, school frustrations, financial worries, and baby rabies filled life, God knows where I am. He understands my fears and worries. He wraps me in His comforting arms. He gives blessings along the way to remind me He is in control, and He continually uses each lesson to shape me into the woman I am supposed to be for Him. I have no idea what lies ahead, but I do know, without a doubt, who has planned my steps. If you are at a transitional point in life, I urge you to turn to the Father. Don’t waste time fretting about things you have no control over, like I did. Instead choose to seize each day, to wake up knowing that God will teach you something and reveal Himself to you, if you allow Him to. Our world is filled with too much stress and not enough gratefulness. From this day forward, I refuse to let stress de-rail me from pressing on towards what God has for me. I refuse to let my feelings of self-doubt and insecurity take over my confidence and joy in the Lord. Above all, I refuse to let twenty-two be a year in which I learned nothing. In a few weeks, I will turn twenty-three. I pray that when I transition from this year to the next that I will look forward for all the things ahead…After all there is a college graduation, the hope of a baby, financial stability (once I’m a graduate), deeper relationships in our community, more time with family, another wonderful year with the love of my life, coming up. Above all there is to look forward to, I pray twenty-three will be a year in which my relationship with the Lord only grows.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-7

Memorial Day with my handsome Hubby! After our house had just gone through some MAJOR organizing!

Memorial Day with my handsome Hubby! After our house had just gone through some MAJOR organizing!

Big project of the summer- Operation new porch and roof.

Big project of the summer Operation new porch and roof.

Me at the JB Concert.

Me at the JB Concert.