To Have and To Hold

Tomorrow, Jordan and I will celebrate two years of marriage. I cannot believe that time has flown by this quickly, and while I look forward to the future, I want time to slow down so I may squeeze the very best out of each minute with the one I love so dearly. I have learned a lot over these past few years, some good lessons, some hard lessons, but all necessary. After some reflection, I have decided to share just a few things I never expected to learn from our marriage. Jordan is my best friend, greatest teacher, and sweetest love, what a blessing it is to walk through life with him.

25 Things I Never Expected From Marriage:

1. Romance would shift from an accumulation of fancy gifts to small acts of service, and the service would mean much more than the fancy gift.
2. Sleeping together would feel like a dream each and every night.
3. The very best date nights would include a redbox movie, QT drinks, and Little Caesars pizza.
4. Being poor and happy, means so much more than plenty of money to blow.
5. There is never nothing to talk about.
6. Submitting to Jordan’s leadership would be a daily act of giving up control, while it has gotten a little easier, it will never be my natural inclination. I pray for a submissive heart as much as I pray for anything else.
7. Knowing Jordan’s flaws and seeing him fail has only caused me to love him more, because where he has failed in the past he has overcome through a humble and contrite spirit.
8. My flaws would become more visible, but I would not walk through my failures alone. Jordan has helped guide me and above all he has loved me unconditionally in spite of myself.
9. A small home with many projects would be the greatest test of a marriage and sanity.
10. The first year would be so hard and the second would feel like the honeymoon all over again.
11. Our differences would slowly begin to fade.
12. One phrase changes the entire course of an argument.
13. Saying “I’m sorry” means much more than being right.
14. The only acceptance I desire would be from The Lord and Jordan- no one else’s thoughts matter.
15. Sacrificing money, time, or pride would mean nothing in comparison to seeing a smile on Jordan’s face.
16. Pursuing intimacy with Jesus only produced a greater intimacy with Jordan.
17. Attraction and physical intimacy would derive from a love of each other’s souls, not a perfect body, face, and hair. No matter how Jordan looks, no one could ever give me tingles the way he does.
18. Time together is the greatest commodity.
19. Marriage would turn even the most logical of men into a Mr. Darcy.
20. Morning snuggles would help us get through the day, especially on Mondays.
21. Despite our differences, we would never want to change anything about the other.
22. Ambitions would change from a desire to be a career woman to aspiring to be the best wife, and eventual mother, I could possibly be.
23. Choosing our battles would become easier the more we desired each other’s needs above our own.
24. Marriage would only work at its peak when we are both in the right place with Jesus Christ.
25. Lastly, I never expected to be able to love Jordan any more than I did the day we wed, but each and every day, I realize that I love more because I have a greater capacity to love more. My heart has grown to love Jordan for the man he was, the man he is, and the man he will become. My heart has grown to love what he loves, and my heart has grown to love him for his integrity, his devotion, and his faithfulness to the Lord.

Jordan and I will never have it all together! We have had to learn so much in the past two years, just to even begin to fully understand each other, but Jordan and I love deeply. It is our steadfast love for each other and for the Lord that has bound us together. Our marriage is a product of perseverance and God’s grace, not of our own, selfish doing. These past two years have been the best two years of my life. Each day I wake up to the man God specifically created to walk through life with me. Jordan shares in my sorrows, joys, and all the moments in between. Aside from the gift of salvation through Jesus Christ, Jordan is my greatest gift. An eternity by his side will never be enough, but while we are here on earth, I vow now, forever, and just as I did two years ago, to stand beside my husband through all things, to love him in spite of whatever may come, and to pursue with steadfast devotion a deeper relationship with our Savior. I love you with all my heart Jordan Lance.